Working Parent Stories
  • Home
  • Why
  • Stories
    • Index
    • Feedback
    • Submit >
      • Guidelines
      • Updates
    • Inspiration
    • Tips | Thoughts | Ideas
  • Book
    • Amazon-WW
    • Gifts
    • Borrow Book
    • Book Club
  • Store
  • Contact
    • Services
    • Connect
    • Subscribe
    • Metrics

Index of Stories

Returns and Routines

5/19/2018

0 Comments

 
Picture
Most kids need routine. Be sure to establish them before heading back to work after an extended leave.
If you're planning to re-enter the workforce after an extended break, and you have kids that aren't newborns, it might help to consider the change from their point of view. Most kids find comfort in routine, so at least starting to establish a new routine, before you actually start the job, is likely to make the transition easier on everyone.

Think ahead. Chances are that you will need your kids to do more for themselves if you're going back to work. Asking them to take on more responsibilities around the house is great for them, and it should help you too.

The key to a smooth transition is to be sure that your kids have taken on these new responsibilities before your first day on the job. Even relatively compliant kids will need "practice" before new routines run smoothly. We found that our kids usually threw three "fits" in a row when we imposed new routines on them. If we could endure those "fits" (which usually were just complaints, whines or worse), and stay firm (and consistent), the new routine tended to click by the fourth iteration and the kids often became enthusiasts. Maybe we're all that way :)

Here are ideas for things most kids can be expected to take on around the house. Obviously their ability to take on various responsibilities will vary widely based on their ages.
  • Dress themselves
    (Layout their clothes the night before. Or, some parents admit that they put their toddlers to bed in the next day's outfit.)
  • Get their own breakfast
  • Pack a school lunch
  • Help with dinner
  • Get their own snacks
  • Vacuum, dust and/or prep for cleaning help (you may need it!)
  • Feed, walk, and/or clean up after the pet(s)
  • Do their own laundry
  • Take out the trash
  • Help in the yard
  • ​Let you sleep in on the weekends!

Most kids are happy to help when they know that their contributions are meaningful; it gives them a great sense of accomplishment and helps build lasting self-esteem. This means that while they're taking on a new responsibility you need to be sure you're not hovering over them, offering too many suggestions, and/or criticizing their efforts. Let them make a few mistakes! Keep yourself busy doing something else meaningful while they tackle their new "jobs".

An important key to success is to be sure that your kids don't view your return to work as an imposition on their routines or a punishment. By establishing new routines before your return, you're likely to ease the transition for everyone and discover how your work actually helps your kids become more capable adults in the future.

Good luck!
Picture
0 Comments

Laundry Lineup

9/5/2017

1 Comment

 
Submitted by Paul Helbling
Picture
"It worked. Not necessarily perfectly, but that just meant that there were a lot of learning experiences along the way."
After I was divorced, I had custody of our four children. The youngest was eight years old at the time. It worked. Not necessarily perfectly, but that just meant that there were a lot of learning experiences along the way. As an educator, I think that was a good thing. 

One way we made it work was to require each person to take responsibility for their own laundry. As I said, it worked. There were some issues, but I didn't get involved with any of them. When there was yelling, I ignored it. When I needed to do my own laundry and found a load of clothes that had been left in the washer, dryer, or both, I just moved them into a basket.

Years later, when I remarried, I shared this strategy with my new wife who was still raising her youngest (12 years old at the time). She was surprised by the idea, but gave it a try. It worked for her too. Even when she found clean clothes that had been in the washer for two days.

Ann Landers probably said it best, "It is not what you do for your children, but what you have taught them to do for themselves, that will make them successful human beings."
Picture
Paul Helbling is a father, grandfather, husband and retired educator.
Related stories:
  • Laundry. Wait, what?!
  • How Clean is Your House?
Read More Stories
Picture
Don't Miss a Story
1 Comment

Laundry. Wait, What?!

7/29/2017

0 Comments

 
Picture
"As working parents, sometimes all we can do is laugh and play the hand we're dealt. "
Sometimes it's the simple stuff that provides satisfaction (and bragging rights).

One year when the kids were little, we reported in our Christmas letter that each member of the family had worn clean underwear every day of the year. It felt like one of our biggest, and maybe most meaningful, accomplishments ;) I used that data point to convince myself that we were one of those really “together” families.

But then my husband, always intent on self improvement, told me he thought we ought to raise the bar for the next year. As the person in charge of laundry at our house, he thought I ought to commit myself to providing clothes that were not only clean, but dry too. (So maybe his underwear had been a little “damp” some mornings, but it was clean! And that seemed like the most important part to me.)

As working parents, sometimes all we can do is laugh and play the hand we're dealt. (Or in the case wear the clothes in the dryer - ready or not.)  At least that's what I told him on some of those days our clothes finished drying while we were on our way to work :)

Epilogue:
Years later, my son joined the junior high track team. During one of his meets he was running in a really strange manner. On the drive home, I asked him about it, and here's what he said, "You told me I should never wear dirty socks, so this was the first time I ever ran without socks."  The thing was, I was on top of the laundry! I was sure of it. That night I found about 12 pairs of dirty socks in a pile in the back of his closet. "I can't wash them if you don't throw them down the laundry chute!" I told him. As I said, sometimes all you can do is laugh.

Read More Stories
Don't Miss a Story
0 Comments

    The Stories

    Picture
    Paperback | Kindle | Audible
    Read More Stories
    Don't Miss a Story
    WorkingParentStory

    Archives

    March 2022
    September 2021
    July 2021
    January 2021
    December 2020
    October 2020
    August 2020
    May 2020
    April 2020
    March 2020
    February 2020
    January 2020
    December 2019
    November 2019
    October 2019
    September 2019
    August 2019
    July 2019
    June 2019
    May 2019
    April 2019
    March 2019
    February 2019
    January 2019
    December 2018
    November 2018
    October 2018
    September 2018
    August 2018
    July 2018
    June 2018
    May 2018
    April 2018
    March 2018
    February 2018
    January 2018
    December 2017
    November 2017
    October 2017
    September 2017
    August 2017
    July 2017

    Categories

    All
    Authors
    Balance
    Book Review
    Childcare
    Children
    Choices
    Compensation
    COVID 19
    COVID-19
    Crisis
    Culture
    Depression
    Eldercare
    Encouraging
    Fathers
    Finance
    Flexibility
    Fulfillment
    Funny
    Goals
    Guilt
    Health
    Independence
    Inspiring
    Kids: 5 12
    Kids: 5-12
    Kids: All Ages
    Kids: Babies
    Kids: Teens
    Kids: Toddlers
    Laundry
    Meals
    Medical
    Mornings
    Most Popular
    Mothers
    Parental Leave
    Perceptions
    Pregnancy
    Provacative
    School
    Self Esteem
    Self-esteem
    Stamina
    Stress
    Teachers
    TED Talks
    Telecommuting
    Tenacity
    Thought Provoking
    Time
    Tips
    Travel
    Videos
    Wage Gap

    RSS Feed

Working Parent Stories

Copyright © 2022  |  Working Parent Stories  |  Colorado, USA  
Photos used under Creative Commons from barnimages.com, marcoverch, truewonder, donnierayjones, shixart1985, Gustavo Devito, edenpictures, nan palmero, quapan, The Pumpkin Theory, bark, opassande, Semtrio, Didriks, shawnzrossi, madprime, marksmorton, CT Arzneimittel GmbH, NwongPR, franchiseopportunitiesphotos
  • Home
  • Why
  • Stories
    • Index
    • Feedback
    • Submit >
      • Guidelines
      • Updates
    • Inspiration
    • Tips | Thoughts | Ideas
  • Book
    • Amazon-WW
    • Gifts
    • Borrow Book
    • Book Club
  • Store
  • Contact
    • Services
    • Connect
    • Subscribe
    • Metrics