A question for you: Who is responsible for the household chores within your home? A blogger contacted me and wants the opinion of Working Parent Story readers; that's you! She works full-time, and her husband stays home with the kids, a division of labor that is becoming increasingly common. She is enthused that fathers are taking on the role of full-time caregivers to children in increasing numbers and that more moms are feeling empowered to thrive professionally. She also recognizes that the load on moms could become greater than ever if stay-at-home dads don't take responsibility for many of the household chores. This has become a bit of an issue within her own home, and she wonders if other women who work are struggling with it too. Will you share your thoughts with her by leaving a reply/comment on this site? Thank you!
10 Comments
11/7/2017 01:47:33 pm
Here's what I've learned in 32 years of marriage. People rarely do a good job on a task that isn't important to them, and it's hard to convince people to change what they care about. After a lot of responsibility "experiments" within our house my husband owns all of the cooking, grocery shopping and a lot of the car maintenance. These are all things he cares about more than me. He can't see a crumb on a counter to save his soul, so I do most of the clean up. I can't keep up with the house cleaning, so we hire help with that (not to be confused with all of it). A *lot* of my working mother friends have husbands who do most of the cooking and grocery shopping. While our kids were little I did almost "everything else" which kept me very busy. It basically took both of us "giving" 100% of the time to keep up with the basics. (My husband approved this comment, but did ask, "What car maintenance have you ever done?" LOL)
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11/7/2017 03:17:03 pm
There's some input here too: http://www.workingparentstories.com/contributors/laundry-lineup
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Greg Fischer
11/7/2017 03:33:44 pm
Mary Beth does shopping and cooking. I try to do the dishes when I am not running off to band practice. Basic housecleaning is done by hired crew. MB washes sheets and towels and makes the bed. The rest of the laundry is split. I mow and fertilize the lawn, prune trees, monitor sprinkler, shovel snow most of the time. MB prunes shrubs, cleans out leaves, takes care of flower pots and herbs. I generally take care of car maintenance and home repairs and plan all travel. I kill all spiders (when available) and reach stuff on high shelves. I manage the Netflix queue and all other heavy lifting :)
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11/7/2017 03:57:26 pm
Thank you, Greg, for the info and for the laugh! (And for "Mommin' By The Seat of My Pants", Greg and MB both work full time.)
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Kimberly Wilson
11/7/2017 03:42:34 pm
My husband and I both work although I have an online business I run from home so I get more of the chores so to speak since I am more flexible. I like cooking and am better with the finances so I cook, shop and pay bills. I hate cleaning so my hubby does kitchen/dinner cleanup and all the “old school” traditional male chores: yard, fixing things, etc. I do the light housework (dusting and such) and he does the major stuff. As the kids got older they were required to do more. I do our normal laundry and he does his workout clothes. The kids have to do their own (since age 10 or so). Asking for help and finding what roles work for the family is important. If there is something I don’t want to do I ask him to do it and I offer to take in one of his chores.
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11/7/2017 03:59:15 pm
Thank you, Kimberly. And I know from many lunches with your husband that he spent a lot of time leak-proofing your basement (or something like that)!
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Kathleen Helbling
11/7/2017 03:58:01 pm
My husband, Paul and I are now retired and , interestingly enough, have continued the division of labor that we began when we were both working. It is much as Kathy says, who cares about what. We each take one week of cooking, cleaning up, and shopping. The other takes the next week. Occasionally we would trade a day. Paul does all the floors throughout the house and I do all the laundry. I clean the bathrooms and he mows and prunes the trees and bushes. I take care of the flower garden, and he cuts wood for our wood burning stove.
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11/7/2017 04:01:01 pm
Thank you, Kathleen! You are one of the few I know where you truly share cooking. Interesting.
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Glenda McCall
11/10/2017 08:01:49 am
My husband and I are retired and have always had a pretty even split. We also split chores according to interest and abilities. Tom is the technical guru, a big interest for him. He is an expert window-washer (lots of windows at our place!!). He does most of the car-related chores, although I sometimes wash and vacuum. Mostly I cook and he shops, although he's a good sous-chef. Tom does anything that takes strength, of course.
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