Quiet Time: A Survival Technique

"It worked pretty well and produced some unintended benefits ..."

Some parenting successes are the result of careful planning. Others are lucky by-products of struggling to maintain some sanity.

"Quiet Time" was something we established when our kids stopped going to bed early. We were just attempting to get a little time to ourselves on the weekday evenings. That's reasonable, right?

Once it became clear that the kids needed less sleep, but we still needed some time to ourselves, the term was coined and the rules were defined (and adjusted as they got older): 

• Nobody can hear you (or your music); there were a few mysterious thuds over the years
• You can only leave your bedroom to go to the bathroom; OK a glass of water is OK too
• You can only call out to us if you are bleeding or you can see a bone protruding from your skin; yes, poking your eye out qualifies too, but you get the idea

It worked pretty well and produced some unintended benefits; they became pretty good at entertaining themselves. And we maintained our sanity. Most nights.

Note: Establishing new routines is never as simple as it sounds. Or at least they were rarely easy for us. Like most new things, it took about three nights of effort and reinforcement and reminders before the kids understood that we meant business.

Kathy Haselmaier is a mother, wife, and the editor of Working Parent Stories. She and her husband worked full-time while raising their children.