Getting Real

Because of your extreme efforts now, big progress is likely to occur in the future.

Our son, who is 24, now refers to time as before "sh** got real" and after. His reference point is the COVID-19 pandemic.

Most people I know are struggling right now, at least on some level, and as far as I can tell, few are struggling more than working parents, with the possible exception of teenagers, especially those about to leave home, and young adults who've been forced to move back home. Oh, and their parents. Sh**'s pretty real for all of them right now too.

Most working parents have known for a while what more people have learned over the last month; being a working parent his hard!

But as hard as things are right now, this surreal experience is likely to produce huge benefits for working parents in the future. The world is starting to understand what you do, every day, and they're admiring you. Some even seem determined to help you more in the future.

A recent article about telehealth caught my attention because it included this quote: “We’ve made three years of progress in about three weeks”. A similar comment can probably be made about many of the things that are important to working parents. Now, maybe more than ever, the value of simply staying in the "game" (i.e. working), is high (assuming you have that option).

Eventually this will be over. As most are predicting, there will be a "new normal" at the end, and because of your extreme efforts now, big progress is likely to occur in the future. Here are just some of the outcomes we hope occur (assuming you don't lose your minds in the meantime):

• Telecommuting will become a more respected option for many - even if it's just for short bursts of time.
• The value of flexible work hours will be better understood.
• Parents will have refined and sometimes more balanced roles and responsibilities at home after juggling them in close quarters and watching each other "up close" for this extended period of time. Many are likely to gain a greater appreciation for their partners' unique strengths too.
• Employers have learned just how much they need working parents and are more impressed as they've seen what they're capable of (sometimes up-close and personally -  thanks, also, to many celebrities like the Jimmys (Fallon and Kimmel) for showing humorous perspectives)
• Kids have learned they can add real value around the house. (One humorous example was a comment made by Chris Cuomo, a CNN show host, who, along with his wife, is quarantined with COVID-19, when he recently pointed out that his 17 year old is now running the house and "it's like Lord of the Flies".)

Working parents, when they're not pulling their hair out or in full meltdown mode, are changing perceptions, and in the process changing the world. Right now. Your kids may, or may not, thank you when they enter the workforce and realize the benefits, but because you're doing the hard work now, they're likely to reap the rewards in the future. So just in case they don't say it, let us say it for them: Thank you!

Kathy Calder Haselmaier is the editor of Working Parent Stories, a mother, and a wife. She and her husband worked full-time while raising their children. ​

Related stories:
-- Parenting During a Pandemic
​-- Imagination Engaged
​-- Humor Helps
​-- Adapting to the "New Normal"​
​-- Expect the Unexpected (Good News!)
-- "My" Crisis